Lyrics by Harrumph Artwork by Stunnedmonkey (Apologies to The Beatles)
Come Together (The Skeptics)
Here comes old two guard He come dribbling up quickly He got shoot the roundball He one free-wheeled player He got green light to throw the threes Got to be the favorite He just do what he please.
They got no post game They got no damned footwork They can't stop the big men They shoot cold cucumber He say I know hoops, hoops know me One thing I can tell you is they've got to play free. Come together right now as a team.
He bag the motion He got sloppy spacing He got no adjustments He odd motivator We got smoked twice by Wisky Look there at his brow line you can see his unease Come together right now as a team.
They roller-coaster they got early shooters They got muddy cutters he don't have no answers They play one on one it makes me scream Can't see no improvement this is like a bad dream Come together right now as a team. Come together.
Something (The Skeptics)
Something in the way he recruits Ignores our needs just like a leper, Something in the way he woos them. I don't want to hear it now, I want to believe him and how.
Somewhere on the road he goes Pursuing one more raw Hamburger. One to fit the brand of O here. I don't want to hear it now, I want to believe him and how.
You're asking me will our team grow? I don't know, I don't know. Depends on which ones of them show, I don't know, I don't know.
Something in the way he knows Just how to give all the wrong answers Something in the things he shows me. I don't want to hear it now, I want to believe him and how.
BigRedSpec's Death Laser (Harrumph)
Peach was cute-a-cle, peddled pharmaceutical cures from coast to coast Spending most free time on OTF, Ohh-oh-oh-oh. BigRedSpec a scarred Science grad at Harvard Tells her in a post Lilly is the job that I want the mo-o-o-ost. But as she's typing up her reply, a sound comes like a roar. Zap bang BigRedSpec's death laser shot down upon her head Zap bang BigRedSpec's death laser made sure that she was dead.
Back in lab again Spec will take a stab again At his PhD. Boss wants more coffee and he tells Spec now-ow-ow-ow. "Spec!" yells Boss "I need overnight delivery "For this new machine!" The price is just obscene for this new gizmo-o-o-o. But as the Boss returns to his cave, a sound comes from above. Zap bang BigRedSpec's death laser shot down upon his head Zap bang BigRedSpec's death laser made sure that he was dead.
D.C. end of March BigRedSpec in collar starched Hopes he won't get lost, meeting future boss via the Metro-o-o-o Wife and Little Spec hope that he is not a wreck On this interview (Nail this interview) The office troll chimes in that he hopes not so-o-o-o But as the words are leaving his lips, a noise comes from behind. Zap bang BigRedSpec's death laser shot down upon his head Zap bang BigRedSpec's death laser made sure that he was dead.
Oh! Bracey (Davis)
Oh! Bracey please believe me, I'll never do you no wrong, Believe me when I tell you I'll never do you no wrong
Oh! Bracey, if you leave me I'll never make it alone, Believe me when I beg you don't ever leave me alone.
When I heard you thought you would jump to NBA, Well you know I nearly broke down and cried. When I heard you might follow Haston and JJ Well you know I nearly broke down and died.
Oh! Bracey, if you leave me, I'll never make it alone. Believe me when I beg you Don't ever leave me alone.
Oh! Bracey please believe me, I'll never sit you down (Oh believe me Bracey). Believe me when I tell you, I'll never do you no wrong.
Clubjockey's Old Trailer (The Trailer Park Gang)
I like to hang with the whole gang Down in Clubjockey's Old Trailer in the park He'd let us in, break out the gin Down in Clubjockey's Old Trailer in the park. I'd ask the mates and IUT To Clubjockey's Old Trailer with me I like to hang with the whole gang Down in Clubjockey's Old Trailer in the park We would keep warm out of the storm By burning rubber tires in an oil drum Scratching our heads, lice in his bed Down in Clubjockey's Old Trailer, drinking rum. We would sing and drink all night Get rabies shots for mateys bites I like to hang with the whole gang Down in Clubjockey's Old Trailer in the park. We would shout and then drag out Stunnedmonkey who lives beneath the wreck (Lives beneath the trailer wreck) Oh the fear for every girl who's near These Mongols who play with half a deck (Play with half a deck) We would be so raucous you and me No one there to tell us what to do I like to hang with the whole gang Down at Clubjockey's Old Trailer with you.
I Want You (Recruitment) (Davis)
I want you I want you so bad it's driving me mad He's so studly
Here Comes The Help (Davis)
Here comes the help, here comes the help, and I say we're all right. Hoosier faithful, it's been a long frustrating winter Hoosier faithful, we can't compete with the talent here Here comes the help, here comes the help and I say we're all right. Hoosier faithful, the smiles will come back to your faces Hoosier faithful, we can't compete with the talent here Here comes the help, here comes the help and I say we're all right. Help, help, help, here it comes... Help, help, help, here it comes... Help, help, help, here it comes... Help, help, help, here it comes... Help, help, help, here it comes... Hoosier faithful, I know your faith is slowly melting Hoosier faithful, we can't compete with the talent here Here comes the help, here comes the help, and I say we're all right We're all right.
Because (Harrumph)
Because the ball is round it turns me on Because the ball is round...aaaahhh Because the stakes are high it blows my mind Because the stakes are high......aaaahhh Peegs is all, Peegs is new Peegs is all, Peegs is you. Because the season's through, it makes me cry Because the season's through.......aaaahhh Aaaahhh....
You Never Give Davis Credit (Davisians)
You never give Davis credit You have unrealistic expectations And when he earned that renegotiation you broke down I never hear you be upbeat I only hear you venting your frustration This season was merely an aberration Don't break down
Zero tolerance, Knight is canned Find a new chief, scour the land? All the money's gone, no one to coach Interim title, players back JJ and Haston crash the rack Coverdale is slow, Davis our Coach.
And then that magic season, Davis our Coach. Oh, that magic season Davis our Coach.
One sweet dream AJ's blocked shot, they're running that pro set scheme Soon we'll be in Atlanta Oklahoma-Indiana today One sweet dream came true that day Came true that day Came true that day (yes it did) No recruits above six seven, Big 10 big men are in Heaven
Shout Outs (The OTF)
Here come the Shout Outs Here come the Shout Outs Everybody's laughing Everybody's happy Here come the Shout Outs. Trover Cream Goat Kookie KMWinter DJ Fife DerrickC Cramer ATL tunk dolfingus Lebowskis Super etecnifibre GOIU serenity
Mean Basil Fawlty (The OTF)
Mean Basil Fawlty looks like Bill Gates Cant get no dates he's a day trader Prowls around the board with Aruss Goes to work each day on the bus Thinks that John Kerry is a wuss Such a weird old man Such a weird old man.
Aquanetta seeks Basil out She likes to shout, she's a doppelganger Probably a poster in drag NTTAWWT gag But dressing up is just not my bag Such a flirty old man Flirty old man
Allie and Peach (The OTF)
Well you should see Allie and Peach They like to hang here but stay just out of reach Well back in February they went to Arizon-a Yes you should see Allie and Peach. Yeah yeah yeah.
Get a dose of Allie's spike heels and skirt She shows her girls off when she wants to go flirt And for one more added thrill, she likes to get a Brazil (I'm pretty sure now that I'm going to get hurt) Yeah yeah yeah.
They Live Down In IUT's Basement (The OTF)
They live down in IUT's basement Luring goats to some nasty fates They're plastered on their Pabst Blue Ribbon IUT's wretched little mates.
Didn't anybody warn you? Don't you hear the livestock screams? Sundays are their Be A Hun days, Tuesdays are their pillage sprees.
IUT says he is a broker He plays with stocks and bonds all day At night time he's a frog sweat smoker Letting mates go and have their way.
And so I moved to a new trailer To put some space between me and them And though we tried to put out warnings His new neighbor is now IUJIM.
Didn't anybody warn you? Don't you hear the livestock screams? Sundays are their Be A Hun days, Tuesdays are their pillage sprees. Oh yeah.
Bonehead Blunders (The Skeptics)
Once there was a way to win our home games Once there was a way to win at home Sleepwalk through the offense, no one tries The team lays down again and dies.
Bonehead blunders, shots unwise Booing from our fans a surprise Sleepwalk through the offense, no one tries The team lays down again and dies.
Once there was a way to win our home games Once there was a way to win at home Sleepwalk through the offense, no one tries The team lays down again and dies.
Carry That Blame (The Skeptics/Davis)
Skeptics: Coach, you gotta carry that blame Carry that blame at some time Coach, you gotta carry that blame Carry that blame at some time.
Davis: They never gave me their "A" game They seemed to play with no inspiration When they returned from the summer vacation All broke down.
Skeptics: Coach, you gotta carry that blame Carry that blame at some time Coach, you gotta carry that blame Carry that blame at some time.
The End (The Skeptics) Oh yeah, let's hear Are you going to be our head coach next year? And in the end the team's poor play is equal to what's taught your way. Ahhhhh
Mike Davis (One Skeptic)
Mike Davis is a really nice guy, but he doesn't seem to have a clue. Mike Davis is a really nice guy, it may be time to start anew. I want to tell him that I love him as Coach But I got a feeling things won't turn out fine. Mike Davis is a really nice guy It's time for Davis to resign, oh yeah, It's time for Davis to resign.
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